Lightning's Very Bad Day

It all started when the GM (yours truly) had a very bad day. Rather than take it out on the world, I decided to take it out creatively. Knowing that players too can have bad days, 'Lightning's very bad day' was created. (for SAL - Lightning's creator/ alter ego.)

First the Original Idea:

Take a typical day at Backer Brother's HQ. They've been knee deep in hoop-la just about every time I've used or written about them. What if they're having a really slow week, or couple of weeks. What if all the folks who are always there are on vacation (and nobody thought they could even spell the word) So, you have the Backer Brothers on a skeleton crew, and a very bored Lightning. (Bored because during all this down time, Boomer has been on active reserve training.)

But when the story opens, Boomer's due back, and he and Lightning are going out on a bonafide date. (Knowing full well that the last time they agreed to go on a date, Boomer ended up almost getting killled. As it was, he had been shot and they had to order in)

From there it was to be a series of mistaken identities, false trails and finally an out and out destructo run. It devolved into something completely different. Something that had us laughing and having a good ol' time... while, of course, shooting everything in site.... (which of course, was the idea in the first place.)

Since SAL and I live about 90 miles apart, we played the game using a combination of e-mail, phone and IRC to play. Looking back, I don't think I would have been able to keep up the constant 'Commentator' chatter if we had been live. There were times I regretting not using something more advanced like ICQ, but there were other times I was *really* glad SAL couldn't see my face... or hear me cackle...

The Transcript

<begin e-mail dump>

<this is the intro to the destructo run... short sweet and very, very messy>

Things had been dead at BB ops (Backer Brother's Operations)... So dead that Gina actually got Davy to take a vacation with her. She even convinced Geoff to take some time off and go fishing with his little brother.

The only down side was that Boomer had been on his one month stint of reserve training, but that was over, finally. The only problem was he wasn't at the base when you arrived. Rico explained that Tommy, yes our Tommy had a bonafide date with a real girl. Only problem was she couldn't pick him up and he couldn't drive. You know Boomer probably teased him about it, then recanted when he noticed how upset Tommy *really* was. Her place was only an hour away, and you were due in three, so he figured that was fine.

Only problem was, you were early. On the bright side, Boomer should be back anytime....

You wait....

And wait....

Rico starts fidgeting, he's picking up on your tension. You're torn between worry and anger. Anger that he's late, worried about the cause. Rico runs a scan for Boomer's pager, but it registers in his room. Building scan proves that the pager's there, but Boomer isn't. He hadn't had the time to pick the thing up before he went gallivanting with Tommy.

Now Rico's getting worried. He uses the GPS and finds Boomer's car... parked in front of Tommy's girlfriend's place...

He tries calling, but there's no answer. Rico wants to send a team, but there's only one team up right now, and they're needed to stay nearby, just in case.

You aren't working tonight, so you head out, following Rico's direction. <figure out what you take with you>

Its a long drive. Idiots on the road, trying to start something. A 'gogo gang'... you manage to avoid most of the trouble, but nothing prepares you for what you find... Boomer's Car is out in front of what *used* to be Tommy's Girlfriend's place... Police were there, and news crews.

"Police are still unsure of the cause of the explosion at this time, but it seems clear, that nobody was inside at the time of the explosion. All in all, I say everyone was very lucky... back to you Bob..."

You watch as the camera light goes out and the news lady moves. There spray painted on the curb is the symbol of the Humanis Policlub. And deep sinking feeling you were trying to fight is ready to have its way. There's no sign of Boomer, or Tommy in the crowd, but as you look around, you see a familiar face. Nichelle Richards, a militant meta-rights fighter. She's not exactly a friend, but you have fought side by side from time to time. She's got a sick-worried expression on her face.

She nods at you and you meet her away from the mob.

"Lightening, what brings you here?" she asked stiffly.

You talk to her and you find out that Tommy's girlfriend, is none other than Nichelle's sister. You're really worried now, but then she tells you....

"We caught one of them," she growls. "Bastard was trying to get away. We took him in, bastard won't talk, hoped to find something here, something to use against him. Maybe you can talk to him... you always did have a way with ... words..."

She takes you back to their base....

"*OH,* yeah," Lightning says, reaching into her pocket for her 'Interrogation Procedures 101' chip and slapping it into place. "Let *me* talk to this badboy," she says. "I'll find out where they took our friends." She cracks her knuckles. "If they hurt Boomer..." she leaves the threat at that. "Take me to him," she says, her voice ice-cold.

Nichelle nods. "We'll get them," she assures you. "And once you're done, it will be my pleasure to send him on to the next life."

"Keep your shirt on, Nichelle," Lightning says. "I'm not sending anyone anywhere until we have all our people back and in one piece."

She leads you away from the crowd and to a van. One of Nichelle's people's in the driver's seat waiting.

"Any news?" she asks the driver.

"Stubborn bastard," the driver states. "Fenris had to heal him enough to keep him from bleeding all over the place."

"Near as I can tell, one of your friends managed to hit him before they were over-run. Probably why he was left behind." she explains then nods to the driver. "Home James."

He glowers at her and then puts the van in gear.

It only takes about ten minutes to go from the suburban townhomes to the city's dockside that's housing Nichelle and her crew. Its dark and grim, kind of like the mood. She leads you to a storage room and as she closes the door behind her you see a man in a chair. His cloths are tattered, non-descript. He's well muscled, kind of like a cat. His hands are tied behind his back, his head is slumped forward, his hair covers his face.

Nichelle steps along side the prisoner and picks he head up by the hair and asks "Where are your friends."

"Go to HELL!" the man grunted raggedly.

Something about the voice was familiar, as you move closer, she backhands the prisoner and draws her knife and holds it to his throat.

That's when you get your first look at the 'prisoner'... They have Boomer....

<this e-mail was recieved *after* the game was finished, but is here to maintain continuity?>

Lightning is *PISSED*. "Let me take care of our *friend*," she growls at Nichelle, shaking her head to one side and indicating that Nichelle should move aside.

She steps across the room, drawing a smartgun and quickly assessing how many other people are guarding Boomer. She stands over Boomer menacingly, glaring. "Back off and let me work," she growls at Nichelle.

As soon as Nichelle backs off, if the number of other people in the room is less than three (not counting her, Boomer and Nichelle), she will 1) make like she's going to backhand Boomer, 2) backhand Nichelle with the smartgun, and take the knife away with the other hand (not holding the smartgun), 3) stick the knife into Nichelle's guts, then 4) shoot everyone else in the room using the smartgun. If there are more than three other people in the room, she'll think of something *really* fast.

She's *definitely* hoping Boomer will get the idea and play along...

<end e-mail><begin phone>(from memory)

GM: Okay so your pro-meta-human militant sometimes friend, is holding a knife to Boomer's throat. I forgot to mention, just as humanis feels that every meta should die, these folks feel the same way about humanis folks and well, they seem to think Boomer is responsible for the attack on Nichelle's sister and her boy-friend.

SAL(Player) - Did you get my last e-mail...

GM: No...

SAL: Okay, is there anybody else in the room.

GM: No...

SAL: Okay, Lightning is going to try and take the knife from her and stab her with it.

GM: What?

It was about this point that I *knew* things had taken a tangent that would prove both interesting *and* entertaining... although, it was nothing I had expected...

SAL: She's hurt Lightning's boyfriend. What should I roll?

GM: Forget rolling, just go for it.

It was also about this point that I once again realized that rules and rolls were pretty much pointless and decided to just have fun with the whole darn thing.

SAL: Okay, Lightning's fast, she grabs the knife and sticks the chick with it, not enough to kill her, if she gets medical attention in time.

GM: (still flabbergasted)

SAL: What?

GM: (Feeling control slipping away, but enjoying the ride) That was unexpected.

SAL: (Assuming Lightning's roll) She *hurt* Boomer!

GM: I really hadn't though of this... should prove interesting.

SAL: Lightning helps Boomer up.

GM: He's in serious pain as soon as he puts weight on his right leg. You look, there's an entry wound, healed up and no exit wound.

SAL: They left the bullet in!?

GM: Well, they weren't planning on keeping him around...

SAL: Bastids! Fireman's Carry.

GM: Okay.

SAL: If any of her people are in the way, shoot-em

GM: Okay. (Beginning to realize that the very bad day was a lot worse than expected)

SAL: Take their van, drive Boomer back to BB HQ.

GM: Okay... Boomer by the way is refusing any pain killers, anything that could impair him.

SAL: Fine, Radio ahead to Rico. "Who's on-line in medical"

GM: Kenny.

SAL: "Clearwater," Lightning calls. "We need you, Boomers been shot, Tommy's still missing..."

Kenny "We'll be ready," Kenny answers. "You get him into medical"

GM: Rico activates Tommy's pager only to find it... in his room

SAL(Lightning?) TOMMY!!! If he ends up dead, I'm going to kill that Orc!!!

GM: You make it back to HQ

SAL: Pull Kenny aside.

Kenny: "What's up?"

SAL(as Lightning): "Can you knock him out?"

Kenny: He's not going to like it.

SAL (as Lightning): I don't care, I need to go and he's hurt.

Kenny: I can have him back to you in ten minutes.

SAL(Lightning):How much would it slow him down?

Kenny: Him, none, me...

SAL(Lightning): Knock him out, we may need you later on.

Kenny: Only if *you* tell him why.

SAL(Lightning): Whatever, just do it!

GM: Boomer is out.

SAL: Find out what we know about the local Humanis Policlub's hangout.

GM: Rico asks you to cover the boards while he Decks in and gets you what information he can. They've got Twenty members, a club house on one side of town and a "playhouse" on the other.

SAL: Lightning get ready to go.

Rico: What about Boomer?

SAL(Lightning): I had Kenny knock him out.

Rico: I am so sure I don't want to be here when he wakes up!

SAL(Lightning): Its for his own good!

Rico : I know, but I do not want to be anywhere near here...

SAL(Lightning?) - FINE!

Its about this point that both player and GM realized that the GM was pushing to have her take Boomer with her and recanted. (GM having forgotten how 'protective' Lightning can get.)

GM: Rico tells you who's available.

Rico: We have a main team and a back up, available and not on duty are Eclipse and Rabbit, sorry.

SAL(Lightning): Keep 'em ready in case I need them.

Rico(GM?): Are you sure?

SAL(Lightning): Yes!

(GM still trying to get a spare character in there...)

GM: Rico checks your pager, then hands you four more. (Having had one brother shot and another go missing, he is opting for overkill) He also hands you an 'eyeball' remote and a protection Drone, a big gun with friend recognition, not programmed for the girlfriend though.

SAL: Head back. Still in her van.

GM: you are surrounded by bikers as you near the city... (Nichelle's people)

SAL: Floor it.

GM: They have you surrounded, and are trying to make you slow down.

SAL: Floor it!

GM: There are two in front of you...


It was about this point that the GM realized that SAL's really bad day was being reflected in the game... but hey, that *was* the purpose wasn't it...

GM: You're goosing their bikes?

SAL: Yeah.

GM: Okay.... Two down,

SAL: Slot the driving chip... Slam the van into a slide and whip it sideways...

GM <silence>

SAL: Do I get any of them?

GM <thinks for a minute> Three of them.

SAL: Okay, get moving again. What are they doing.

GM: Mostly picking each other up, one is following you and opens up with machine gun fire.

SAL: Is the van bulletproof?

GM:<think><think><paranoid, militant owner...> Yeah... the others are doubling up on bikes and pursuing.

SAL: Keep driving, try to loose them.

GM: you're losing Radiator fluid.

SAL: Go as far as I can, trying to loose them, ditch the van, literally, hide in the bushes

GM: Okay, they try looking for you, but its dark. They leave.

SAL: How many of them?

GM: 15 with 10 bikes between them... they aren't happy.

SAL: Good neither is Lightning. Make way to the Policlub house.

GM: Okay, its fenced in. Two dogs and 5 guards patrol the grounds.

SAL: Tranq em.

GM: Dogs too?

SAL: Everybody.

GM: Okay, you get them.

SAL: Take a uniform... How do I look?

GM: Like an Elf in a Humanis Guard uniform.

SAL: Put on hat... What? It worced for SPOCK... had an accident with a mechanical rice picker...

GM: You hear a call on the Radio for one of the guards.

SAL: Great! Ignore it, move on...

GM: you hear a sound behind you.

SAL: Turn.

GM: You see 4 guards and two dogs.


GM: No, unconscious.

SAL: So?

GM: You tranqed 5 guards.

SAL: Look around...

GM: You see nothing...

SAL: Fine keep moving.

GM suddenly realizes that Lightning had done nothing about getting around/through/over the fence, but figures, 'hey, we're on a roll.'

GM: Okay, from Rico's description, you know there's a front door and a back door and a series of Basement windows.

SAL: Go for the basement.

GM: First window is locked and painted black.

SAL: Prison or a darkroom... Move on...

GM: Next window is open and heat is coming out...

SAL: Heat? Would it burn me?

GM: No, its like dryer heat... you can even smell the fabric softener.

SAL: Go in through the window. Check the room out.

GM: Laundry room.

SAL: look around...

GM: you hear the padding of dog feet and a growl.

SAL: Tranq him...

GM: (sensing a pattern) Okay. <whine> <thud>

SAL: go to first room's door, do the standard D&D checks...

GM: Traps, trickdoors...

SAL: The worcs.

GM: You hear voice from the room.

Clem: "What was that?"

Lem: Dunno, you check it out...

Clem: Fine,

GM: The door opens, Clem steps out.

SAL: wait for him to close the door and Tranq him.


Lem: CLEM? Whatz happin'n Clem?

SAL: <silence> Wait

Lem: If you don't come back in here, I'll cut her...


Lem: I mean it...

SAL: Fine, which way does the door open?

GM: In.

SAL: Kick the door in, Tranq him.

GM: okay... he's out. There's a girl tied up against the wall

Girl: What do you want?"

SAL: Its okay, I'm a friend.

Girl: My boyfriend... they, they... said they were taking him to their 'playroom', you've got to help him.

SAL: Your boyfriend, wouldn't happen to be an orc would he.

GM: she nods.

SAL: its okay, we'll get him.. Page Rico.

GM: By the way, since I haven't explained it, the transport system draws a lot of power, what the BB's do is siphon the power slowly and charge up their batteries, so they try not to use it too many times in a 24 hours period. And somebody has to get sent with the Transport pack.

SAL: Okay...

GM: Eclipse arrives with the pack and asks you the situation.

SAL: tell him.

GM: He offers to stay with you...

The GM still trying to slip in a supplemental NPC figuring things are going to get very interesting in the next few minutes.

SAL: Accept. Things are a lot worse than expected..

GM: He nods and puts the pack on the girl.

Eclipse: Rico, Link it!

GM: She goes poof.

SAL(Lightning) how long will the tranqs hold?

Eclipse: Depends on whether they have blood filters or not.

SAL: Terrific. Switches to regular bullets and silencers. start forward.

GM: The dryer is done.

SAL: is it buzzing?

GM: Yep, and you hear somebody at the door at the top of the steps.

SAL: Great, hide...

GM: Eclipse grabs you, grabs the dog and starts dragging you both to the back, then hands you the dog and drags Clem into the back room, throwing the bold behind them.

SAL: No, we could question the person.

GM: Fine, Eclipse unlocks the door.

SAL: move forward

GM..and you hear two crunching noises.

SAL: Turn.

GM: Eclipse moves out of the room and looks at you.

SAL(Lightning): <HEH>

Eclipse shrugs almost, but not quite sheepishly.

GM: a woman comes down the stairs to check on the laundry.

SAL: Stop her.

Woman: <GM assumes whiny, frightened voice> You're one of those...

SAL: Easy lady, I'm here looking for a friend.

Woman: No, you're going to hurt me...

SAL: Put hand over her mouth

SAL(Lightning): We just want information.

Woman: No your kind isn't to be trust....

SAL: Tranq her...

<Sal is reminded of long distance Rates><end phone portion>

While waiting for SAL to join the IRC channel, thoughts start whirling in the demented mind of the GM... nobody checked the 'hostage'... <chuckle> GM is relieved that Player cannot hear the wicked cackle that escapes.

GM's husband shudders and goes back to TV.

GM: Okay, you tranq squealy girl, but when you turn your back on her and the girl, you hear the twisty cruchy <crack> noise.

(Lightning) sigh

GM: and she's limp in Eclipse's arms

Its about this time that the GM relieves some of her own irritation (remember, I was having a bad day too).

(Lightning) come on, Eclipse, let's find Tommy and get out of here!

GM He looks at you and you can see a look of pain. He did it because she had a knife and the tranq didn't worc on her.

(Lightning) Are You OK?

> GM: Her knife is planted firmly between the two bones of his forearm.

(Lightning) "shit, Eclipse, I'm sorry." Help him get the knife out, use some of their clean laundry to bandage him. Keep the knife

> Ever the master of understatement he says... "Ouch"

> "The girl, were you sure about her?" Eclipse asks. "Did you check her?"

(Lightning) Lightning's pissed now. They've drawn blood, Not well enough....

> GM: He was talking 'bout 'Tommy's Girlfriend'

(Lightning) Oh, SHIT. Well, Clem and company were sure *acting* like she was a prisoner, but I could've fucked up there too...

> "Shit," Eclipse is paging Rico on the sub-vocal radio.

(Lightning) call in to Rico, give him a heads-up, if its not too late

(Lightning) <you aint kidding very bad day>

> GM: (Hey... that's the plan... If it ain't nailed down kill it) (just kidding....)

(Lightning) grrrrrr.

> "Can't talk now..." Rico answers

(Lightning) SHIT.

(Lightning) Let's go find Tommy and his *real* girlfriend.

> "And we can't go back without him." (Him being Rico)

(Lightning) No shit

> Eclipse nods grimly

(Lightning) how many of my friends did I just do in, I wonder...

> "Don't think about that now," Eclipse tells you. "Worc with what we can, take care of the rest when we can."

(Lightning) nod head up the stairs

> Eclipse follows, covering the rear.

(Lightning) if it moves, kill it (silencer is on, both guns)

GM If you think it might move, kill it.

(Lightning) that too

(Lightning) twice

> You hear somebody through a speaker. "Here chickee, chickee..."

(Lightning) ignore it

> SPEAKER: "What's a matter, don't you want to play???"

(Lightning) keep ignoring it

> SPEAKER: Come on up, the party's just getting started.

(Lightning) shoot the speaker

> SPEAKER: that wasn't very nice. (different speaker, other side of the door, but you can tell from the tininess, its a cheap speaker.

At this time, the GM is inspired, turning the search and destroy mission into a little bit more. Shades of Running Man and a couple of other things start dancing in her mind. GM is *very* glad SAL has no voice/visual feeds...

(Lightning) "I'm not in the mood..."

> SPEAKER: here chickee, chickee...

(Lightning) which way does the door open?

> GM:Hinges are on this side, so in (towards you)

(Lightning) motion to E to shoot through the door past me as I open it and flatten myself against he wall

> SPEAKER: Aw, the little chickee is afwaid...

(Lightning) shoot the fucking speaker

> ECLIPSE nods.

(Lightning) "I don't like folks as calls me 'chickie'" Lightning says in a fake Welsh accent

> GM : You open the door and E fires three shots. One into the speaker, one into the guy at the door and another through the wall to the left (over your head.) You hear two thuds.

(Lightning) "Nice shooting."

> SPEAKER: No fair... Chickee brought a playmate.

> SPEAKER (second voice) Cheater, cheater cheater....

(Lightning) "Yer damn right," I mutter. Motion to Eclipse to take the left, I'll take the right

> GM : When you look at E, you see movement behind him.

(Lightning) shoot whatever is behind him

> as you fire he flattens himself on the stairs. In a way that you wouldn't believe possible.

(Lightning) heh

> as soon as you shoot he's up and covering you again.

(Lightning) I'm ignoring that... did I get whatever moved?

> "I don't like shooting galleries" (from E.)

> GM: Yes... It was guard number 5

(Lightning) I figured.,.

(Lightning) good. shoot him again for good measure

> "I think he's dead..." Eclipse assures you.

(Lightning) Motion for him to take the left and me to take the right

> He nods and follows your move, covering you all the time.

> SPEAKER : "Ooh, a professional," the voice calls.

(Lightning) "Got that right." I mutter

> SPEAKER: "Donny, will you please tell our contestants what they're playing for?"

(Lightning) Ignore him, look for the speaker, and SHOOT IT.

> SPEAKER:"Well Joe, our contestants are facing off against an unknown group of defenders in this revised version of capture the flag."

> GM :There are speakers everywhere.

(Lightning) Look for defenders and KILL THEM fuck the speakers

> GM Now that wasn't very nice was it?

(Lightning) look at Eclipse - "stick together"

> Eclipse switches to IR / Low-light goggles and nods

(Lightning) keep one eye closed, OK?

> SPEAKER: (Donny) "Of course they are up against a ten second penalty for un-sportsman like conduct, abusing the equipment and all.

> "Flare Comp," He answers. (He being Eclipse)

(Lightning) [O

(Lightning) "cool!

>SPEAKER: (Donny) In today's game, our invading team will be up agaisnt a ten minute clock.

(Lightning) a<grumble> short keyboard cord M</grumble>

(Lightning) "Work fast," I tell Eclipse.

> SPEAKER (Joe) "Oh, then I guess that ten second penalty could cost them the game...

(Lightning) (was that another voice?)

> He (Eclipse) nods and points up, then around the floor and looks at you questioningly.

(Lightning) floor, then up

> GM (Joe took back the narration, Donny had started explaining the game to the studio audiance)

(Lightning) move out towards the first door to the right

> He nods and places one of Rico's remotes on automatic. Anybody come up the stairs, they're toast.

(Lightning) Nod. "Worcs for me." Head for the door.

> He takes the far side of the door, watching your back and the hallway.

(Lightning) which way does the door open?

>GM: out, into the hallway

(Lightning) E on the hinge side or the non-hinge side?

> GM: No hinge side.

(Lightning) pop the door, E can shoot whatevers' inside

> GM There is silence, then a very loud thud <roll> sound

(Lightning) cover E

(Lightning) flip the door the rest of the way open and shoot inside

> SPEAKER : "Well, they're nothing if thorough," Donny comments.

> SPEAKER: "Ooh, looks like she got the vacuum cleaner." Joe adds

(Lightning) check inside the room, then keep going if Tommy's not there "Bite me," I mutter

> SPEAKER: "That'll be another ten second penalty..." Joe states.

(Lightning) go to the next door, if one's across the hall worc that way...whoever's on the hinge side opens, non-hinge shoots

> GM next door is down the hall same side.

(Lightning) how big is this place? (something I would have known in advance, I hope!!!)

> GM: Yes (you know beforehand) Its a failry large house, set up like a Victorian...

(Lightning) keep going, no stopping... Don't rush, just MOVE

> Okay, you keep going through, same procedure. The next one is booby trapped. As the door opens a crossbow bolt imbeds itself in the far wall, barely missing E's head.

(Lightning) <mental note: I wonder if the ten-second penalty was for the bite me or shooting the vacuum cleaner...?">

(Lightning) check the room, then move on

>GM: The room is empty except for a cut out of a Tommy Sized orc, full of holes.

> back lit even

(Lightning) [mental note: bastids] keep going

> GM: Next room hinges are on your side.

(Lightning) duck down, open the door

> GM: Eclipse is on the far side. holding back...

(Lightning) he'll be shooting or whatever

> (till the door has been opened.)

> GM: Boom...

(Lightning) open the *#@!^ door! ;) boom?

> GM : Boom, cannon boom

(Lightning) I'm down, remember?

> SPEAKER: "Now that's got to hurt," Donny comments

(Lightning) (below elf-height)[D did they hit anything?

> SPEAKER:"Well you know, he shouldn't have been crouching so close to the wall with a cannon on the other side..." Joe counters

(Lightning) is E OK?

> SPEAKER: "Why don't we check the instant replay on that while our contestants try to patch themselves up..."

(Lightning) [mental note: *now* who's abusing the equipment]

> "Ouch."

(Lightning) HIT THE FLOOR

> Fucking ouch.

(Lightning) crawl over to E make that slither

> "Things do not look good for the visiting team," Eclipse tells you with a wink.

(Lightning) Are you hit?

> GM: you can see his suit took most of the impact, no bleeding.

> Eclipse : "Ouch."

(Lightning) "ouch is right,"

> "Time for a huddle," Eclipse states.

(Lightning) yeah... but they prolly don't allow "time outs"

> Eclipse: "What kind of perverted sick..."

(Lightning) I dont know, but when we find them, they're mine

> Eclipse nods. Got any Demo?

(Lightning) is the Pope catholic? Pull out the appropriate chip, and the block of C4

> "Shit, nevermind... probably put Tommy someplace we can blow him up."

(Lightning) and the battery ... yeah, probably right

> Eclipse : "I don't like this game."

(Lightning) that makes two of us let's get Tommy and get out of here

Lightning) eye kin newt tipe

>GM: <chuckle>

> "Next trap, I'm dead," he signs at you. (He being Eclipse)

(Lightning) 'dead-dead, or fake-dead?'

> Eclipse : Take the crawler remote and have it follow you....

(Lightning) do it

> Eclipse: Fake, hopefully (he's been spending too much time with Tracker) He goes down the hall.

(Lightning) heh ok. Take the remote and head for the next door. get down, open, shoot, look, move on

> GM: Next three doors are okay. and the floor is clear.

(Lightning) find the stairs, head up

> "Wanna bet the stairs are the next trap?" Eclipse asks

(Lightning) no, do'nt tgake suckers' bets send the remote up first?

> Mono filiment third step, he states as he steps high.

(Lightning) does the spy-eye move?

(Lightning) skip the third step

> yeah. (If Rico were able to run it that is)

(Lightning) turn it loose, send it up C .... ah, shit, nevermind

(Lightning) "Rico?" <subvocal radio>

> Here goes, Eclipse tells you.

(Lightning) follow him, cover him

From here on out, we were just having way too much fun! (But we were running out of our own available time) <sigh>

> RICO : "Not now mom, I know you need toilette paper, buy you'll just have to wait... I need it right now."

> GM : Eclipse takes the next step and you hear an audible "click"

(Lightning) cover Eclipse

(Lightning) SHIT

> "That's what I said," Eclipse

> "That's what I said," Rico

(Lightning) keep moving... [very funny]

> "Get down," Eclipse

(Lightning) [sorry, Rico]

> E: On second thought, go past,

(Lightning) do it

> Once you're clear of the stairs, he dives off the edge as the stairs go boom.

(Lightning) "E?"

> SPEAKER : "And the quarterback is Toast."

(Lightning) keep going. Hope E is fake-dead [mental note: they don't like their house much, do they?]

> SPEAKER: "Well Donny, I'd have to give him 2 points on the dismount, that landing sure needs work, too bad he won't be able to work on it."

(Lightning) keep my fingers crossed and keep going with the remote behind me

> SPEAKER: "Well, Joe, he must have known going into this competition that the house always win... HaHa...

(Lightning) [mental note: bad jokes = slow death]

> SPEAKER: Well, our surviving contestant has made it to the second floor, and she has about 5 minutes remaining on the clock.

(Lightning) keep moving. He's probably in the attic. [mental note: PLEASE don't be dead, Eclipse]

> You hear a whrrrr ing nosie at the end of the hallway.

(Lightning) go through the second floor as quickly as possible, shoot everyCC

(Lightning) get down! and shoot it!

> GM : stun beam chest level...

(Lightning) shoot the stun-beam-generator

> Wrrr <chuga><chuigga> Shhoooooo....

(Lightning) is that a hissy-noise like gas? put on the gas mask anyway...

> GM: It fires again making Chugga chugga shoooo noises, but good answer. Aim is off... You hit it, but its still trying...

(Lightning) stay low, crawl to the far end of the hall, and disable the thing QUICKLY

> GM It sparks nicely.

(Lightning) go back door to door

> SPEAKER: "Well, that cost her a few seconds, but she seems to have deactivated the stun drone..."

(Lightning) keep moving, ignore the common taters

> SPEAKER : "The price of the equipment will of course be taken out of her winnings hide..."

> (should I keep them going anyway?)

(Lightning) listen VERY carefully

(Lightning) [sure, sal's enjoying it,. Lightning isn't] [unless it's really bogging you down]

> GM: Cool, cause I'm have way too much fun with this... :)

> GM note: This by the way is actually their fun house.

(Lightning) [but it is getting kinda late... :( ]

> I know...

> How much more time can you spare?

(Lightning) sal: bastids!

(Lightning) 'bout half an hour?

> Deal.

(Lightning) {'little shop of horrors' is on TV}

(Lightning) {appropriate}

> You hear several shots from the drone and a THUD behind you.

(Lightning) check over my shoulder, but keep going door to door

(Lightning) {little shop, little shop of horrors...} {bop-bop}

> SPEAKER : "Ooh, the ref has thrown a flag on that play... use of an unauthorized drone on the playing field..."

> SPEAKER: "Black flag on that play for sure Donny."

(Lightning) [mental note: shit] Start kicking doors in. [mental note: where ARE you, E?]


> "Bomb in attic, no Tommy," you hear over the secure comm (Eclipse)

(Lightning) [reply "cool"]

> Eclipse : "Traps galore."

(Lightning) keep looking

> Eclipse : "Moving down to three."

(Lightning) [don't get caught in any] {be careful]

> "Ditto"

(Lightning) open the first door taking usual precautions

> Eclipse : "Shit, Victorians... Didn't they have a lot of ..."

> <Static...>

(Lightning) [FUCK] open the door

> SPEAKER: "Naughty Naughty players... If you're going to split up like that..."

(Lightning) [i have to keep going] [MN: fuck you]

> GM : You hear a thud on the third floor and a rolling noise.

(Lightning) {Eclipse, you OK?}

> <static>

(Lightning) {shit}KEEP GOING on the second floor, make my way to the stairs

> SPEAKER: "Well Don, I'd have to say that that trick with taking the hit early on in the game was a stroke of genius, but as you know not everything works out as planned."

> SPEAKER: "And that's the nature of these games Joe."

(Lightning) (20 minutes)

> Next door, no trap.

(Lightning) keep going

> Second, shotgun.

(Lightning) duck


(Lightning) keep going

> GM :Third door, an ork kissing a girl cutout with the ork blown to hell.

(Lightning) Ork cutout, I hope? [MN: this is not funny] Keep going

> Final door, Cut out Girl holding dead Ork, full of holes, puddle underneath.

(Lightning) I assume both cutouts go upstairs

> GM: Yes... Puddle not cut out though. Smells like gas

(Lightning) [MN: yucky...] check the room directly above

> Bingo!

(Lightning) got me an Orc and a gal?

> Yep

(Lightning) condition?

> She's upset, but not all so weepy that she couldn't take care of herself...

(Lightning) him?

> He's pretty beaten up, and shot His first words to you are "Boomer?"

- Lightning has quit IRC (Read error: 131 (Connection reset by peer))

Things of course were going way to well at this point so of course, SAL got booted from IRC... After waiting, GM paged SAL with the following message ... :

Come back, all is forgiven...

- Lightning has joined #duck_run

(Lightning) shit sorry got kicked off

> Yeah... Just paged you...

(Lightning) ok

> <sigh>

> GM: Re: Tommy He's pretty beaten up, and shot His first words to you are "Boomer?"

(Lightning) keep going "Boomer's ok, gotta find Eclipse and get y'all outa here'

> Tommy : Bomb... They said there was a bomb...

(Lightning) Shit deal with the bomb

> GM : You see no bomb

(Lightning) [cute page] then get them out and find Eclipse "There was a bomb on the stairs,"\

(Lightning) {Eclipse?}

> SPEAKER: "Well Donny, it looks like our surviving player's found the flag, but can she get them back to 'home base' before the timer expires...

> SPEAKER : "Or they do," Donny adds.

> <static> (Eclipse's radio)

(Lightning) get out of the room, head for where Eclipse went thud-roll

> GM There's a bowling ball there.

(Lightning) [fuck]

(Lightning) [anything in brackets is not said aloud]

(Lightning) give Tommy a pager and tell him to get out

> SPEAKER: "Well, our player seems to have misplaced her team mate, should we go to instant replay?"

(Lightning) "activate it and get the hell out of here. I'll get Eclipse and we'll get out on our own"

> SPEAKER "Well Don, this close to the end, I think we should follow the action, looks like this one is going all the way down to the wire.

(Lightning) If he argues, tell him I had Boomer sedated and he'll need to see him ASAP to be sure he's OK

> SPEAKER: "Wait Joe, It looks like the player is trying to send the flag down to the base... we can't allow that can we?"

(Lightning) "GO DAMMIT!"| [if Joe and Donny put their ugly mugs in the hall, they're both toasted]

(Lightning) {Eclipse?} {Rico?}

> Tommy looks at you and [better name the girl hu?] Terri and nods as he leads her away.

> <static> Eclipse.

> RICO: "Mom, I keep telling you not to call me at work."

(Lightning) {Eclipse???} keep looking for Eclipse

> Eclipse <static>

(Lightning) {I was hoping you were off. (to Rico)

(Lightning) look for Eclipse same procedure

> RICO: "Well mom, if you had thought of that *before* you went out, I'm sure feeding your cat wouldn't be a problem. But you should have asked first"

(Lightning) {I'm SORRY!!!

> <STATIC> Eclipse.

(Lightning) Keep looking. go to floor 3

> SPEAKER : "Well Donny, its a really close game..."

(Lightning) {Tommy, get OUT of here!}

> SPEAKER: "Yeah Joe, I know what you mean. Shame of course that they can't win"

(Lightning) "Will you two just SHUT UP?!!!" Lightning's getting pissed...

> SPEAKER :"Now that wasn't very sportsman like..." Donny states

(Lightning) (We can assume they will continue the running commentary, which you can send me later... Sal wants to get this resolved before she goes to bed)

> GM: (its almost done)

(Lightning) Go find Eclipse

> As you go by a door, you hear a knock.

(Lightning) open the door, carefully

> Eclipse looks at you and smiles

(Lightning) Hug him. "Let's get out of here."

> Looks like he's gotten hit in the throat by something.

> He smiles again and points toward the back of the room.

(Lightning) "Tommy and Terri should be bamfing out" what's at the back of the room?

> He points to his ears and makes a mouthing motion with his hands.

(Lightning) (huh?) (sal doesn't get it)

> he cups a hand over one ear and pantomimes somebody talking into a microphone. He by the way has no gun anymore.

(Lightning) do I see the Enemy? if so, SHOOT THEM

> GM: no, there's another wall shoot the fucking WALL

> GM: secret room in secret room. Donny and Joe.

(Lightning) Shoot them both

(Lightning) twice

(Lightning) each

GM starts wondering just *how* bad was SAL's day....

> Eclipse stands leaning against the wall.

(Lightning) do I get 'em?

(Lightning) if so, check Eclipse, then get out

> GM "and the armchair quarterbacks are toast."

> GM: You book, the front door is open, Tommy and Terri are outside facing down a bunch of biker types.

(Lightning) Get out, get to Tommy and Terri, if they're still around, go home

(Lightning) "Uh, hi guys," to the biker types. "Sorry 'bout earlier..." (sheepish grin)

(Lightning) "I'll pay the medical bills..."

(Lightning) (sheepish grin)

(Lightning) "Boomer's my boyfriend," I say. "I-uh-berzerked a little?"

> "Michael Allen Rodgers, you leave these people alone. They are my friends and if you don't get us a ride this *instant* I will tell my sister about your little ...

(Lightning) "Huhhh???"

> (Terri, yelling at one of the bikers)

> "She started it," one of them complained...

(Lightning) Raise an eyebrow.

(Lightning) "Sorry," I explain.

> "Can we discuss this *away* from this hell hole?" Tommy growls.

(Lightning) "I didn't kill anybody," I say...

> "And who did *what* to Boomer?" (Tommy again)

(Lightning) "Not any of your people, anyway..."

> Rico: Mom, I got your toilette paper, when you want me to drop it off, I just got off duty.

(Lightning) "They had him, thought he was one of these bastards," I say, gesturing back at the house. "Roughed him up. I went a little nuts

> Wooosh...

(Lightning) I think we have a ride, but I'll let you know?

> Not woooosh

(Lightning) it'd be funny.,.. :)

GM comes to the sudden realization that not only has SAL/Lightning enjoyed wreaking havock, she is now actively seeking trouble...

(Lightning) {Little shop, little shop of horrors...}

(Lightning) (Sal's gotta shut down soon..)

> Anyway, we can escape later...

(Lightning) OK

The game is over, we've blown off steam and had a great time... Alas, it must end. I have a feeling, we'll be seeing more of Donny and Joe...


Donny : So, when did you feel everything slip out of your control?
GM: Well Don, it was supposed to be more directed than controlled....
Joe: But you admit that it was out of control don't you?
GM: [Maybe they won't be back]

Copyright 1998 - M.T. Decker / Sal Robertson

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